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ANY relationship takes work. Parent-child, brother-sister, boss-employee, girl-boy, and yes, girl-girl, boy-boy. Marriage should be different? The love factor should override getting hurt feelings, un-connectedness, loss of libido, toilet seat positioning? I don’t think so. Admittedly there are things we need to do to re-affirm our commitment to marriage or plain old partnered arrangements. Specifically, marriage is a lifetime of work. Every single one of us is different and we all need to he heard, appreciated, challenged, given limits, revved-up, and screwed silly some of the time. Our partner is not us. We have to make ourselves heard, show appreciation to get appreciation, confront perceived bad treatment, set boundaries, and be the perfect lover. Dr. Phil says “Be a selfish lover” but that’s material for another blog.

Shouldn’t we be working toward making Marriage harder to enter into? Classes, tests, clear contractual agreements (not the “before God” crap) and being able to display some competency before being allowed to confuse/enhance somebody else’s life? Where’s the handbook?

Me and my sweety have made it going on thirty-six years…but not all our ups and downs were in bed. The kids actually made it easier to stay together. Which brings me to yet another question: shouldn’t you have to qualify and get a license before having children? Talk about a lot of work! Ciao.